Hope your weekend was kind to you! I have been absolutely exhausted due to a new raise on the dosage of my medication. I had debated about raising it with my doctor, for about 2 months. We did it, and now I seem unable to function daily with this new dosage so far. I’ve only been on it for a week, and I am so tired when I feel like I shouldn’t be.
I have a question for you guys. I had thoughts about making a sort of mental health planner. It would be somewhat like a regular planner, but it would have a mental health focus to it. Where you could, maybe, write down moods, journal, etc, maybe even have a place to write about your medications.
Would you guys buy it?
Let me know if this is worth it!
(BTW: Went to a petting zoo. Saw this little piggie!)
I am STILL in training at work for my certification for Peer Support Specialist. It’s been put on hold. The actual certification. So I am currently still shadowing other employees. It is so much fun, though!
I have done a few things in the past week. I am, for one, getting set up with a personal counselor to talk about different issues I’m experiencing in my life. I am also getting my lower back checked out, because apparently I have compressed disks. So I need to go in for an MRI.
I have also started on my vision board! Which you can see above. I mailed six people, who I’m close in friendship with, post-it note pads. I asked them to write me affirmations, and send it back to me. So far I have received two, with one person refusing to do it, unfortunately. I need to view other people’s vision boards to get an idea of how I’d like to do mine.
I should’ve seen it coming a mile way. I’m know myself better than anyone, right? Better than any doctor, psychiatrist, therapist, right? But I thought I would be fine.
I’m late posting this, very late, because today (see: this morning) I went through a grueling emotional rollercoaster, and physical turmoil. I didn’t have my medication. I was out, and I hadn’t slept all night.
I was out due to some error on either my pharmacy’s side, or my doctor’s side. Which ended up having to have my medication pre-authorized, but I was out. I was already feeling the physical, mental, and emotional withdrawals that come with antipsychotic withdrawals.
I was told I would have to pay out of pocket to get the medication, or wait days for it to be pre-authorized. I decided to pay out of pocket. Went up to a local pharmacy, and they quoted me at $400. Which I did not have. I felt tears welling up in my eyes. I turned around and looked at my fiance, and began to spiral at the pharmacy, emotionally. The lady asked if me I wanted to wait for the authorization. I almost said yes, but instead said, “Can you use GoodRx?”. She said “Yes”, and I prayed for a lower price. She told me it would be $52 dollars total. I went and shopped for groceries, and came back, nervously. She said they didn’t have enough in stock, but she could give me a 3 days supply, and I can come back in three days and get the rest. That I wouldn’t have to pay anything for today.
I breathed a sigh of relief, and my thoughts calmed in my head. I looked over at my fiance, and gave him a look of relief, but a look of the fear I had been holding in all day.
I should’ve seen it coming, missing a night’s and day’s worth of medication, but I didn’t. For one, this was a semi-new medication for me, so I didn’t know what to expect with missing a day’s worth of pills. I thought I could will myself through it, though. That was my biggest mistake. I’ve already been under enough stress while on all my medications. So, I’m not quite sure what made think I could be ok going without, especially when I didn’t know how long I’d be without.
I’m excited to say that I am partaking in an art project out of New York. It’s called the Brooklyn Art Project. You buy a sketchbook from them, it’s already decked out with a barcode and instructions. You send it back to them, and they put it on file for other people to look at. You can have it digitized, too, so others can see your art online. They even text/email you each time your sketchbook is viewed! So exciting! I can’t wait to fill it out and send it back.
I am still working on that self-care guide. Life is busier for me than it ever has been, and I don’t get a chance to do things I’d like to do more often. Which sucks, but so many good things are coming my way, and I’m super excited about it.
This is also a really hard time for me, because of all the stuff going on. I’ve gotten a wake-up call in the past week about my physical health, and my mental health has been tested to the max. I had a manic episode yesterday. Which I believe was due to a prednisone shot I received for back pain. Apparently, prednisone causes mood changes! I did not know that. I have so many things to do regarding my physical health, and it’s really overwhelming for me.
I hope you guys don’t mind me taking it a bit slow, but I surely will get everything done. And then more stuff will pop up! Such is life, right?
I usually post every Monday right now, but this is SERIOUS.
My fiance is a serious, serious candy stealer. I had to buy a fridge locker and safe from Amazon, just so he won’t my stuff. I told him “If I get two snickers bars, and I give one to you, great, but don’t eat yours AND mine, too”. He’s went through 15 or more pounds of candy in a short number of months. Two 5 lb. bags of sour patch kids in a weeks time!
I’ve begun the process for my certification for being a peer support specialist. That’s the best thing going on at work, right now. Also, got this free t-shirt from work! I’ve been writing up ways work on self-care, and I want to share them soon with you guys. So be on the lookout for that!
I am moving somewhat soon. So I am really, really, really looking forward to that. Much bigger place, room to move around, two stories, it’s gonna be awesome.
Besides those updates, what would you guys think of a podcast connected to this blog/website, having to do with mental health issues?
I’ve been in a down phase this past week, but I’m committed to updating my blog once a week, every Monday.
Work is slow, because I’m new, and my title is new to this organization. I’m excited as heck to work, though, so I’m ready for things to get into a routine pace. They want me to get certified by the end of this month.
There’s been a bit of depression for me. My only living grandfather past away last night. I didn’t really know him well, but I am sad. I also haven’t had a chance to write all week, nor all weekend. I’ve been exhausted from work and personal things I had to do on my days off. So I slept or relaxed for two days. My current support system isn’t going to be the way I’d like it for awhile, because of the death in my family.
All in all, things are slow right now, but I’m hoping it will pick up this week. I hope to get some writing done, to do more at work, and become less exhausted (but that may not happen).
I bought this new tea kettle in the picture above. I hope you guys like it!