Tag Archives: recovery

Project in the Works


Hey guys!

Hope your weekend was kind to you! I have been absolutely exhausted due to a new raise on the dosage of my medication. I had debated about raising it with my doctor, for about 2 months. We did it, and now I seem unable to function daily with this new dosage so far. I’ve only been on it for a week, and I am so tired when I feel like I shouldn’t be.

I have a question for you guys. I had thoughts about making a sort of mental health planner. It would be somewhat like a regular planner, but it would have a mental health focus to it. Where you could, maybe, write down moods, journal, etc, maybe even have a place to write about your medications.

Would you guys buy it?

Let me know if this is worth it!

(BTW: Went to a petting zoo. Saw this little piggie!)

Thanks for reading! And until next time!

Down Phase


Hey guys,

I’ve been in a down phase this past week, but I’m committed to updating my blog once a week, every Monday.

Work is slow, because I’m new, and my title is new to this organization. I’m excited as heck to work, though, so I’m ready for things to get into a routine pace. They want me to get certified by the end of this month.

There’s been a bit of depression for me. My only living grandfather past away last night. I didn’t really know him well, but I am sad. I also haven’t had a chance to write all week, nor all weekend. I’ve been exhausted from work and personal things I had to do on my days off. So I slept or relaxed for two days. My current support system isn’t going to be the way I’d like it for awhile, because of the death in my family.

All in all, things are slow right now, but I’m hoping it will pick up this week. I hope to get some writing done, to do more at work, and become less exhausted (but that may not happen).

I bought this new tea kettle in the picture above. I hope you guys like it!

Thanks for reading! And until next time!

This Went Left


We can’t afford to live where we are living anymore, and it’s really putting me in the deep end, emotionally.

I’ve been very depressed, procrastinating, and letting everything fall to the wayside. This is hitting home way too much.

My Love and I may have to move back in with our parents (separately), after just recently getting engaged. We can’t afford a home, another apartment, or even the same apartment. We are spending $719 here, plus all bills separately from that. We can’t seem to make it on his income, plus my disability income.

We are lost and just looking for a miracle.

Please bear with me for the moment being.

Thanks for reading! And until next time!

This Man Is My Life


Literally. And all I can think about everyday.

I just want things to be better between us. Obviously, if he didn’t love me, or like me, he wouldn’t have proposed! So I definitely need to do my part. I have considered couples counseling, but now that I think about it, so much of the problem, I feel like, is me. Well, to an honest extent it is, but then, it isn’t.

I became depressed back in January this year. What started off as talking about a possible engagement between us, to my mom, ended up disastrous. Things became worse and worse in my head, and everything spiraled out of control inside me. I became depressed. I stopped showering, taking care of the house, I binge ate, I stopped brushing my hair, etc, and honestly, i’m still at that point, but it’s gotten better as time has went on.

My Love and I talked today. We had an argument about our feelings. He says, “I work 40 hours a week, and I come home and have to clean up the house AND cook.” I said, “I’d be in better spirits if you just spent time with me.”

Honestly, we never came to an agreement on the time spent together before the argument ended, but I promised him things would change and that I would start cleaning more and cooking more.

All of this stopped once I got depressed back in January. Just everything, like I said above plus more! I grew up in a house in my early twenties where my Dad hoarded a bit. Everything was always filthy. I hated it, but never cleaned. I’m not sure why, other than I didn’t want to clean. I just stayed in bed all day due to depression, anxiety, and psychosis. I either slept or ate, but I was always in bed. My Love said I need to break that habit of being in bed. I’m thinking I do, too, and need to start contributing to the household. Especially if i’m not working, I suppose.

Here’s to better times! 🍻

Thanks for reading! And until next time!

Is The Depression Gone Yet?


So, I don’t want to jinx myself, but the depression seems to be wearing off. I worked 1 day in the past week. Start small. That’s what counts. I’m lucky enough to have disability to fall back on.

Xena is so much better. I think her cough is gone 99%, so that’s good. She’s much happier, and playing now.

I would like to get one of Dave Ramsey’s books. I’m feeling so inspired right now. I signed up for college again, and FAFSA.

I think i’m MOSTLY back to myself. Thank God! But 🤞🏽!

Thanks for reading! And until next time!

The Great 180


I think I might have overcome the depressive episode, or starting to. Which is great. I’m not yet doing the things I fully should, but i’ve got headway on a few things.

    I have been searching for a new job
    I have ordered my planner for my hustle & flow.
    My mom bought me candles for my evenings to relax
    I have been waking up rested so far!
  • I have ordered my vitamins from Care/Of for my health and wellness.

It’s going good so far. Not much has been accomplished, but I feel positive about how things are going.

Thanks for reading! And until next time!

Met With A Job Counselor


I had an appointment with my job counselor yesterday, and we talked about everything going on with me. My low energy, my depression, and me not working the past three weeks.

He’s sending me to a psychologist so I can talk everything out. He also listened to me while I spoke about everything. I wanted to cry, but I didn’t want to embarrass myself. He’s just my job counselor.

. . .

I also would like to spend more time with My Love, but he’s so into his video games and tv, it’s hard. Will talk more about that later.

Thanks for reading! And until next time!

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